While laying on my floor I mentioned to one of my toddlers, "Hey, why don't you be the mommy today, and I will be the baby?" As soon as the words came out of my mouth, it felt so great to admit it. I am pretty tough on myself. You know what I am talking about. The "step-it-up, you-are-not-good-enough, keep-pushing, don't-slow-down" stuff that we put ourselves through on a daily basis to keep up with life. The junk that we think we ought to say to ourselves to keep moving forward instead of letting our guard down and actually admitting...it would be nice to be a baby about it for once. In Eve Ensler's newest book, "In The Body Of The World", she starts it off by saying "A mother's body against a child's body makes a place. It says you are here. Without this body against your body, there is no place." This, to me, is such a beautiful saying. One of the reasons I love it so much is that it reminds us that there is so much beauty and purpose in our bodies beyond just "rockin' our jeans". But it also has me thinking that our bodies really do long to be loved, and when we fall prey to thinking we have to strive to be loved by being thin, successful, talented, prosperous, or beautiful in others eyes, we miss the chance completely.
What strikes me is that being held against our mom's assures us that we are ok...just because we are alive. Not because of our size, not because of our milestones, not because of our behavior. We are loved because we exist.
This has always been a hard concept for me. Obviously as we become adults we have a responsibility to show up in the world and love others with our time, our bodies, and our gifts. And the friction begins as soon as we start to wonder what it means to matter. So we reach, and strive, and we push, and we pull to find our way to matter. Some of it is grand and authentic, other times it is ugly and pushy. Acting like a baby may be an outward expression of your need to be still and listen to your heart again. It's OK to have some needs!
Imagine being pulled into a mother's warm embrace. Imagine knowing that when you cry people care, and when you giggle people want to giggle with you. Being an adult can sometimes be really really hard. No matter what your age. But the body can be your greatest avenue for relief and for inspiration to help you keep on with your journey. Consider using to this 5 minute recorded meditation by Kelly McGonigal to begin using your body to find your true needs and begin to connect with what will help you thrive as an adult again.