Shame can take us out when we have a longing to make changes in our lives. When it comes to your wellness and strength, addressing shame can be a huge part of taking forward positive action for your health. Loving ourselves well requires a paradox of tough and tender, fierce and kind. Learn how you can overcome shame by listening to your body and being open to what it needs.
I want to share my secret to staying motivated to stick to fitness with you, but before we get to that I need to tell you a little story.
My mother is sort of like Mrs. Claus. There was even a time we all dressed as elves and handed out gifts at her business back in the day.
For as long as I can remember, my mother kept a "giving room". Not a Living room...a Giving room, all year round.
She stocks it full of wrapping, ribbons, boxes, bags, and loads of random things to give-away. We would often joke at Christmas time that if something didn't fit, give Shirley a minute, and she would come out with three other choices.
What's interesting about my mom's room is that I never went in to snoop around. I learned from a young age that the anticipation of getting a gift was better than getting the gift itself.
That's the secret to sticking to your fitness routine day after day, week after week, month after month, and for years to come:
The gift of working out can come one day at a time, but on those days when you just don't feel like it, when you discipline yourself to tie those bows on your shoes, and wrap up your body in workout clothes, you are investing in a long-term gift of health.
Too often we dread what the effort will feel like or how much we might miss out on because we took the time for ourselves.
There's lots of excuses I could have used to justify opening those packages or to allow myself to dig through my moms hidden treasures. However, my mindset was what gave me an expectant hope for the ultimate gift.
When we choose to live in a state of hope and expectancy for the best outcome- it changes us.
Are you desperate for a change? Do you long for the gift of feeling great when you move? Do you find yourself wishing you could find a way to burst with energy again?
With black Friday just a few days away my mother is already wringing her little hands getting all geared up for her shopping and stocking this year.
And I am holding on to a little secret gift of my own that I'll be releasing this Thursday. It's the biggest giveaway I have ever offered and it is guaranteed to start shifting your health in just 10 days.
Stay tuned friend, I'm putting the final touches on my gift to you.
In the meantime, would you shoot me a response to this e-mail letting me know what the best gift you ever received was? Or, even better, would share your stories of what getting gifts was like for you growing up? I'd love to hear your precious memories.
Wishing you holy, healthy, healing,
Nicole
I learn a lot from fairy tales.
“Once upon a time, a golden harp lived in a beautiful castle. The harp’s magic song cast a spell of peace and plenty over the land. Everyone was happy in the land called Happy Valley” - Mickey and the Beanstalk
In most fairy tales, the enchantment is focused on an evil witch/stepmother/meanie who casts a spell to put a princess to sleep, or keep her locked in a tower, or take away her voice, etc.
But in this knock-off story of James (Mickey) and the Beanstalk, the Golden Harp is there to cast spells of PEACE and PLENTY.
What story do you believe about your health and your body?
Are you in a state where you find yourself run down, overwhelmed, foggy and fed up?
What would it be like to feel at PEACE with your body and have PLENTY of confidence and energy?
If you are like many moms- particularly moms with little one’s like me, or who have more than one child, or who are burning the candle at both ends to keep your life going and still work or tend to other family needs, then finding this Golden Harp sure would be helpful.
Obviously there is no Golden Harp coming any time soon to rescue you or the one you love who is in this boat. However, you can access peace with your body and find plenty of energy and confidence.
It starts with your story. Or at least the story you tell yourself.
If you believe that:
- you cannot take time for yourself
- you are all alone
- your body will never “be the same”
- you have too much going on to make changes now
- nothing has worked in the past, so why try now…
then, you will remain stuck.
However, if you start to shift your thinking and at least open your mind to the possibility that there is peace and plenty available for you as you take baby steps, then you are already a huge leap forward toward accessing your own beanstalk miracle.
Here’s a Thursday Throwback Video I made for you from 2010 to help you manage your expectations and start finding renewed peace and plenty.
I'd love it if you would share this message with any stressed out, over-tired, and/or frustrated woman you know! And if this message hits you at home- don't hesitate to reach out for a chat, I have some tricks up my sleeve to help you out.
Healthy Blessings,
Nicole
Most often our motivation is tied to a fear of failure, a fear of disappointment, a hope of increased joy and satisfaction, or our innate desire to accomplish a purpose-filled life.
In any case, having ample motivation is important if you want to make a change in your life - especially when you aren’t particularly in the mood to push past your comfort zone.
“Passion is not what gives you bliss, but what you’re willing to suffer for, what you genuinely believe to be worth the exercise.”
When you get really clear on what motivates you the “why” overcomes the suffering and makes taking more painful steps a little easier.
But what about when you get stuck and can’t seem to find your will?
Coveting what someone else has will always leave you feeling like you are not enough, that your life somehow has less meaning, or that everything you do doesn’t measure up- so why bother anyway??
In our world of social media and sexualized images everywhere we turn it’s easy to find plenty of things that induce a state of envy, especially when it comes to how easily so-and-so lost 10 pounds, or how “x” diet is the new miracle, or how someone just finished their 5th marathon.
Of course, these are certainly inspiring and motivating stories, but let’s be honest…sometimes it can really make us feel like we have a long way to go, or get us wondering “what’s wrong with me” or “I wish I could do that!”.
The cure to envy is to celebrate. Celebrate every single tiny step you have made to advance your health forward. Celebrate other people for every single little breakthrough they have. Tell people they inspire you and get curious about what they are doing!
So write yourself a love letter of encouragement, call a friend to ask her what she is doing to look so buff these days- and then set your gaze on a tiny step you can take forward today that gives you pride.
Of if you really want the accountability to stay out of envy mode so you can make your body your strength rather than your excuse, then check out my new Monthly Online Health Coaching Membership. I will hold your hand, cheer you on, and get you unstuck.
Then leave some comments below about what motivates you!
Most clients who come to see me are hoping to ultimately lose weight. Yet once that goal has been discussed, the deeper longing rises up, and what bubbles to the surface is a hunger for more energy and confidence.
Saturday, May 7th at 8am, I am hosting a Restoring Strength hike at Marshall Mesa Trail in Boulder (I am keeping my fingers and toes crossed that the weather will be nice and the trail will be less muddy!) to energize your body with a little technique you can do every day, and to help you revive your “Fun Flair for Self-Care”. The hike is about 3 miles, and I’ll be there with snacks and beverages to boost your self-care love while you get to walk some amazing Colorado ground with other inspiring women. Don’t miss the fun.
After 9 years in private practice as a personal trainer, and over 17 years working in health and wellness… I can tell you that it takes strength to get stronger.
Weight loss isn’t easy for many people who lead busy lives and who are dealing with hormonal issues. And isn’t that most of us?
What I see time and time again, is that the dividing factor between those who gain the energy they need to keep pursuing the habits that lead to weight loss, and those who give up, is the strength and resolve a person has to stick with their intentions.
Inside of each of us is a well spring of child-like energy that stems from times before we held limiting beliefs.
Children don’t often care about the outcome, they care about having fun.
They get curious about how much they can lift at once.
They dance around because they feel like it.
They sprint to entice you to a game of chase (because that’s a really fun way to feel loved).
It’s actually really really simple. We just make it hard because we’re adults.
No matter how tired or un-motivated you are, to cure the blah's in your movement get curious about what feels like play to you.
Balance on one foot, Strike a funny pose and hold it; See how far you can jump; dance around to a silly song. The endorphins from the smiles and laughter alone will be worth the effort!
And if you are in need of some consistent energy to get the get-up-and-go desire for play, check out my "Consistent Energy to Strengthen Your Body" Video Series to learn how to rise up and move.
